Dean Answers Questions About Online Dating

Donald asks…

online dating?

I met this guy off of one of the online dating services, everything has been good so far…but he is currently going through a divorce for the second time (he 40 and i’m 26), I dont have a problem with the age difference because i have always dated older men. my problem is he’s been hurt not once but twice so now it hard for him to open up and trust…. I’m currently at the point of giving up, not only because of his emotionally rollercoaster, but he like to make promises but never fulfills them..what do you think this is a case of?

Dean answers:

=it doesn’t appear he is on an emotional roller coaster. I am not as concerned about him getting divorced for the second time as I am about all of the broken promises which destroys trust. Chances are he is the type of person who could never open up and trust. Remember a zebra never loses his stripes. Take care of yourself and move on to someone who deserves your love and you don’t have to work so hard. Best wishes.

Michael asks…

Online Dating?

I want to know & hear what people think of online dating. Any tips. What are the best sites to try. I am fit & nice looking just have a hard meeting the right guys. I am really tired of the bar scene. Thank You.

Dean answers:

It’s such a big topic. Some of the pay-for sites are the best because it really ensures that only “serious” people are listed online. These have been recommended in a number of places:
1. America’s Internet Dating
3. American Singles
4. EHarmony
8. Great Expectations
10. Yahoo! Personals

I don’t really like though, I tried it once and I had to fill out a 460 question-thing befoer I started. It took me like 40 minutes and then I only giot contactewd by jerks who lived miles away.

Start slowly. Have a look over the main sites and see what you think.

Oh yeah, you should also read all over their tips about online safety and so on.

Best of luck girl.

Richard asks…

Online dating??

Does anyone else share this opinion of online dating. I am an attractive 22 year old woman who has been dating online for the past few months. I have been on quite a few dates and get quite a few emails. Out of ten emails I might respond to one. I just find that there is something missisng with online dating and am wondering if anyone else feels the same way. I feel that any guy I choose will be the same guy every girl chooses because of looks, success, whatever so when I go out with an attractive guy online I feel like I am his 11th date of the day and in competition with every other girl on the site. I know this might be true in real life dating too but I think this feeling is magnified with online dating. When I do go out with a guy more than once I get the feeling like it is only a matter of time before another online girl comes along. I am also getting the feeling that any attractive guy on there is only looking for quick sex.
The whole thing is just strange and I’m finding it difficult to really keep any lasting connections because I have no connection whatsoever to these guys in real life. I feel like online dating would work if I was ok dating unattractive men but because I’m attractive I am looking for an attractive guy. Is this making sense to anyone? Does anyone else feel this way? I want to hear others experiences / opinions.

Dean answers:

That’s dating in general. Even when you meet up with folks the usual way – parties, through friends, at work – it’s a chance. Always.

What you hope to do when you’re dating is find someone that has the same world view, the same outlook on life – and the spark. Online dating gives you a larger pool of individuals to draw from.

If you’re going for the guys that all women would want – it doesn’t matter where or how you’re meeting them – the issues remain the same.

William asks…

Online dating sites – Can anyone recommend to me an online dating site that actually works?

OK so I’ve used quite a few online dating sites with no success. I’m lonely and haven’t been on a date for quite some time now. I’ve been trying to hook up with women online but I never get a response from the women I send out messages to on the internet dating sites. I’m beginning to think the whole internet dating thing is a scam and actually doesn’t work. So has anyone used any dating website that has actually yielded good results for them? Thanks.

Dean answers:

OK so you are new to the internet and you are jumped into the online dating scene. As some people have already pointed out, internet dating can be a very tricky path to navigate. Because majority of dating websites don’t verify the identities of those who register on those sites, you are vulnerable out there. Anyone at all can join these dating sites under whatever identity they chose. You can have a 50yrs old man pretending to be a hot 22yo dude. You might have a kid pretending to be an adult.

And the worst of them are the scams out there. These are guys who pretend to be girls or just guys who will make you fall in love with them and take your money. If you are trying to date online, there are several precautions you must take.

1. Never give out your true identity until you have met the person and got to know them enough.

2. When making initial contacts, use the dating site’s messaging system. Don’t communicate with your real email address. Most dating websites have their own messaging systems that allow you to contact anyone through their site rather than using your own email address.

3.When actually meeting a date from an internet dating site, always insist on meeting at a public place for the first few times and get to know the person well before you start meeting them in a private setting.

4.If you are a woman meeting a man from an internet dating site, always carry a pepper spray. Lol. And insist on an afternoon date in a public setting.

5.Get to know as much about the person as you could before meeting in a private setting.

So take the above precautions and you should be ok.

The dating sites themselves are often OK. Mostly your credit card details and other personal information are safe with them. There are a few shady ones out there but they are not difficult to spot. One really good dating site I used in the recent past to meet a couple of girls was,

That is one site I’ve had success on meeting single women in my area. My interest though was more on the sex part. Not a relationship. But I find you can have success with it too if you are just interested in a relationship.

Now I find that most of the people who complain they can’t get a date online is basically down to one thing. YOUR PROFILE on the site. This is what anyone will read to decide if they should contact you or not. You need an interesting profile in order to attract potential date partners. You profile consists of the Title, a description of yourself and what you are looking for, your interests and also your profile picture. Most dating sites will list your profile photo and your profile title in their search results. You need a catchy title and profile picture.

Make yourself sound interesting and fun. But don’t try to be too impressive as you might push a lot of people away. I can’t write too much here but I have tons of advice I could give you with regards to getting a date online. But what you asked was if there was any dating site that actually works. The site I’ve had success picking up women on recently has been

Just be careful. Hope this helps in a way.

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