Dean Answers Questions About Online Dating Advice

John asks…

Does The Advice From Online Dating Coachs Work?

Hi has anyone tried out the various dating advice these online coachs like the modern man or David Deangelo give for guys to approach and women and get a girlfriend?

If so did the dating advice/techniques actually work for you when you tried it?

Anyone got any stories?

Dean answers:

If you want to cut to the chase. Read this book from the link. It’s writen by a women for men. You will learn just like in school the “How too’s”.

Makes dating so easy. Once you learn what a girls signals are and act upon them, you will be dating more women than you can ever imagine.

My buddy read this book then acted on the signals girls were sending him. In less than a year he dated 170 different girls. He said that it was so easy, that it took away the challenge. I said, well a year ago you were complaining about not getting dates.

It’s just having to correct information and acting upon that.

George asks…

advice on online dating advice?

Need some advice on online dating
I meet this guy from a dating site, we went on one date that went well, we even kissed at the end of the night. He asked me on a second date and I said yes. I have been following his status on the dating web site and he has not been on in a week, today I checked and he was online.
I am assuming he is not interested, which is weird because he texts me though out the day for about 2 weeks now.
What do you guys think?

Dean answers:

You are not in formal relationship. SO he has the right to talk with others.

Mark asks…

online dating advice?

I have never done online dating, I have a long time girlfriend anyway but our close friend has started it and he realy likes a girl on it. But he only likes her from the photos, he has not even emailed her yet.

Any advice for how to break the ice when it comes to online dating. Hes 29, not that shy, but doesnt wanna across as typing the wrong thing. Is it as simple as

“nice pic”
or “I like your profile

Dean answers:

I used to do the whole online dating thing, and wrote an article about how to get girls to like you better (based on your emails and profile): http://www.ehow.com/how_5171514_girls-like-writing-better-emails.html

I’m not a Spambot or anything…this is a real article lol. Hope this helps!

Oh, and “nice pic” or “I like your profile” are both too vague. Be specific, like “I love your hair” or “I see that you like Beethoven too”.

Thomas asks…

Any advice with online dating? Should I try another site or just give it up for a while?

I only met one decent guy and it didn’t work out. I quit the site I was on and want to try meeting people the old fashioned way again. Anyone have any advice on meeting people. I am usually too shy to attract any guy.

Dean answers:

Well, you’ve not said how long you’ve been on the site, and that’s a factor.

You’ve also not mentioned whether you were messaging guys, or waiting for guys to message you. If you were waiting, perhaps you should consider trying sending a few emails. If you’ve sent some, perhaps you should look at the guys you’re messaging.

I’m willing to bet, as you’ve said you’re shy, that you’ve not sent much in the way of messages. Online dating is tough. It’s very tough, even by modern dating standards, and you’ve got to be able to deal with a lot of silence. But, if you’re sitting and waiting for stuff to come to you, you’re not exploiting the site’s full potential – and if you’re paying for it, that’s just silly. Find the guys you think you might like to meet and send them a ‘hello’ message; in honesty, what is the worst that can happen? They’ll not respond? Well then you’re in the same place you were before, but with a little more sure-footing.

And if you have sent some messages, perhaps it would make sense to have a look at the guys you’ve messaged. See if there’s a pattern in the sort of guys you’ve talked to. Is there a certain type? Is it a type you’re willing to look beyond, just on a message/one date basis, just to see how you’d do out of your ‘normal’ zone?

Ultimately, you’ve said you’re shy. And that’s fine. But pulling yourself from dating sites is not going to make more happen in the real world. Either you do more online, or you do more in the real world, or you do both. Sure, if you’re on a paid dating site, I’d drop that, but if it’s free there’s no harm in being online. And, to be honest, you’re going to face the same problem in RL as you are online: unless you take the lead, you’re going to be waiting for guys to come to you. If that’s what you want to do, fine. But you’ve got to learn to be patient as you wait for the right guy to stop biting his tongue and come over.

Much better that you find what you want and go get it, wouldn’t you say?

Joseph asks…

need online dating advice!!! unique question..?

alright so i met this wonderful girl on this dating site who lives on the completely different side of the country. we chatted online and seem to really like each other. i have her number. what kind of action should i take because i cant ask her out since we live so far away from each other…help! thx in advance for any advice

Dean answers:

Me and my bf met online sometime in April 2006.After almost everyday of talking online..[at first no webcam] he decided to meet me in person,to find out if it is something like..we’re wasting our time and investing our emotion or what we feel is true?But then after we met,things get even better and still we continue our only way of communication,which through the internet.I should say we are one of those lucky people who found amazing love and build it through online.He went back here,spent longer time[almost 4 months the second time he stayed here] and planning to return next summer.
So i think if you can find ways then better meet her in person,then you will find out if the feeling is for real or you just amazed and infatuated.
Goodluck

going 2 years and we’re still happy…the distance?we’re half of the world apart!

Ken asks…

Where can you get great advice about online dating?

Does anyone know of any sites that have great online dating ideas/answers?

Thanks

Dean answers:

I’ve used SinglesWarehouse.co.uk for online dating

they’ve got a great blog and have just started doing a great places to date thing.

It’s very personal service and the people who are signed up to their online dating site are pretty good.

Definitely worth checking out.

Michael asks…

Online Dating Advice????

When using online dating, how should i word my message when i first contact a woman

At the moment i use:

Hey, im Dave. Just got into reading your profile, and am generally interested.

Ill tell you a little bit about me…erm..Im 22yrs old, am studying to be a driving insructor. I like goin to pubs/bars, Love to go travelling. I like any type of music really, just depends on my mood at the time. Occasionally a dvd at home to chill out to…

Would like to get to know more about you? If interested have a look at my profile and get in contact. Hope to speak to you soon :)

Dave x

But im not getting any replys, and ive tried to contact loads of women on the website. When they then go on to look at my profile it then says a bit more about me etc, and they have looked at my profile but not got back in contact. Im an average looking man of 22 got abit of beard (which is tidy and can make me look older).

Im now woundering if it is either my introductry message i send to them or is me in general that puts them off. I have been told the message seems laid back, but they said that was a gd thing?

Can anyone help me out here please on the message and how to word it to get replys to get women interested to go for a date etc. Any advice greatly apprietiated…..

Cheers

Dean answers:

Hey Dave,

The first thing you need to understand is that most women on these online dating sites get totally FLOODED with e-mails from guys. Most of them are all the same. They use a boring subject line like “Hey” or “Hello.” Since these all look boring, a woman probably isn’t even going to open many of these e-mails.

If you want to make sure that your e-mail gets read, you need to be more creative. Mention something unique that you read in her profile. That will usually do the job.

Secondly, most guys send out either perverted or boring messages. Don’t tell her how hot she is and don’t tel her with your whole life story (she can get that from your profile anyway).

Just say something sort and funny. Again make this unique, like something you read in her profile. If she writes back to you, then you have a more lengthy e-mail discussion.

For example, there was a girl I saw who was holding two Starbucks cups on her profile picture. My first e-mail to her was simply: “So, I take it from your photo that you REALLY like Starbucks…” That’s it! And it totally hooked her.

Robert asks…

Online dating advice?

I recently met a guy online and have been emailing each other for a week now every day. Thing is, in the last two emails he sent he hasnt really asked me questions to intiate a response from me. He always answers my questions and always replies to my emails usually on the same day. Is that a sign of him slowly losing interest ? The thing is i made the first move an emailed him first. Just don’t want him to feel overwhelmed by me being forward. Should i wait for him to email me first (Our last contact was an email from him) or just reply to his email even though there wasn’t anything to reply to, more of a response to my questions ? I have been on this online dating for awhile and this guy is the only person i have even been remotely interested in so want to do this right. Any advice would be appreciated.

Dean answers:

A lot of guys just don’t say much in the way of asking questions. Yes, they’ll ans. Yours, but they just can’t think of much to say. He sounds like one of them! If he’s answering your questions the SAME DAY you’re asking them, I wouldn’t say it sounds as tho he’s loosing interest tho. Just get to know him a little better, you’ve only been emailing him for a week now, that’s not long. Give him a chance to get to know you better & see if he doesn’t start saying more the longer you get to know him. Good luck, honey.*

Steven asks…

Do you have any advice for online dating?

I set a profile up now, and it seems like everyone is Bi, Ugly or has a kid.

Dean answers:

Well…

For a start, you might try being a little more sensitive and not call people ugly or make single mom’s feel bad…

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