Dean Answers Questions About Pick Up Lines Funny

Mark asks…

What are some pick up lines that you think are funny?

I’m bored so I wanna hear some funny pick up lines. funniest gets best answer!

Dean answers:

Did you fart? Because you blew me away
You must be in a wrong place – the Miss Universe contest is over there.
Was that an earthquake or did u just rock my world?
I may not be a genie but I can make your dreams come true
Are you a magnet cuz im attracted to you
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
I wish you were DSL so I could get high-speed access.
I know its not Christmas, but Santa’s lap is always ready.
Baby your like a student and I am like a math book, you solve all my
“Why does it feel like the most beautiful girl in the world is in this
Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want for
Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
I was blinded by your beauty so I’m going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.
I’m sorry, were you talking to me? Her: No. Well then, please start.
I know I dont have a chance, but I just wanted to hear an angel talk.
Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you?
Hey I just realized this, but you look alot like my next girlfriend.
Are your legs tired, because you’ve been running through my mind all day long.
Are you lost? Because heaven’s a long way from here.
POOF! (What are u doing?) I’m here, where are your other two wishes?
I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away.
Girl, you better have a license, cuz you are driving me crazy!
If you were the new burger at McDonalds you would be the Mcgorgeous!
Do you have the time? (she gives you the time) No, the time to write my number down .
Let’s make like a fabric softener and snuggle.
Are you an interior decorator? When I saw you the room became beautiful.
Hello, I’m a thief, and I’m here to steal your heart.
Is that top felt? [No] Would you like it to be?
Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
Is your last name Gillete cause your the best a man can get.
Are you a parking ticket? (What?) You got fine written all over you.
I’m invisible. (Really?) Can you see me? (Yes) How about tomorrow night?
You can fall off a building, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me.
I have never had a dream come true until the day that I met you.
You look life my first wife! (how many have you had?) none.
Do you have a sunburn, or are you always this hot?
I’m addicted to yes, and I’m allergic to no. So what’s it gonna be?
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
Turn to the girl sitting next to you at the bar and say… “I’m not really this tall….I’m sitting on my wallet.”
This is a test of the emergency pickup line service. Beeeeeeeeeep. If you had been any less beautiful, you would have just heard a bad pickup line.
If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib.
I know I’m not a grocery item but I can tell when you’re checking me out.
If beauty were sunlight, you’d shine from a million light-years away.
Do you mind if I hang out here until its safe back where I farted.
Life without you would be like a broken pencil…pointless.
Your body is a wonderland and i want to be Alice.
I’m like chocolate pudding, I look like crap but im as sweet as can be.
Can I have directions? [“To where?”] To your heart.
Are you an alien? Because you just abducted my heart.
Did you fart, ’cause you blow me away!
I hope there’s a fireman around, cause you’re smokin’!
If you were a booger I’d pick you first.
Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, it’s just a sparkle.
You’ve been a bad girl/boy. Go to my room.
If beauty were time, you’d be an eternity.
Do you know karate? ‘Cause your body is really kickin’.
Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?
Like the sheets on your bed I want cover you with love.
Do you have a Bandaid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
Hi, I just wanted to give you the satisfaction of turning me down; go ahead say no.
I hope your day is as radiant as your smile.
You make me melt like hot fudge on a sundae.
You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.
Are you an alien?, because you just abducted my heart.
What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.
I can tell your future, it is you giving me your number.
Hi, I’m Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
Giant polar bear (What?) It’s an icebreaker. Hi, my name is….
Your so hot when i look at you I get a tan
I must be a snowflake, ‘cuz I’ve fallen for you.
You look so sweet your givin me a toothache.
My love for you is like the universe…neverending!!
If looks could kill you would be a weapon of mass destruction.
You – “Did it hurt”. The other person will naturally say “Did what hurt?”, You – “When you fell from heaven.”
Excuse me, can you empty your pockets? I believe you have stolen my heart.
Do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes!

Paul asks…

Do girls think pick up lines are funny?

I always see them used in movies, and any girl I’m with will laugh at them then, but in a real life situation is a funny pick up line a good icebreaker? I’m not like saying one of the super dirty ones, but one that is clever funny and not offensive. I guess if I were to sum up the objective of the pick up line it would be to make the girl laugh, and start small talk. Also I want to say the line because I consider pick up lines to be a form of joke and I love telling good jokes.

Dean answers:

If you can make a girl laugh in the first few minutes of meeting you are off to a good start. And don’t forget a shy girl will have difficulty in keeping up a conversation so try to keep the conversation going in case she is just tongue tied but interested.

Thomas asks…

Any good and funny pick up lines or jokes?

I want to hear something funny for some reason. It doesn’t even have to be a pick up line or joke. It can be like a funny story, too. or anything funny you can think of.

Dean answers:

A Blondes Year In Review

Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels…..
Helllloooo!!!…….bottles won’t fit in printer !!!

Got really excited…finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months…..
Box said “2-4 years!”

Trapped on escalator for hours …. Power went out!!!

Tried to make Kool-Aid….wrong instructions….8 cups of
water won’t fit into those little packets!!!

Tried to go water skiing…….couldn’t find a lake with a slope.

Lost breast stroke swimming competition…..learned later,
the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

Got locked out of my car in rain storm….
Car swamped because soft-top was open.

The capital of California is “C”….isn’t it???

Hate M & M’s….they are so hard to peel.

Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days .. Instructions said 1 hour
per pound and I weigh 108!!

Couldn’t call 911 …… “duh”…..there’s no “eleven”

Daniel asks…

does anyone know any funny pick up lines?

I need to know some funny and original pick up lines for a lugh with my friend!

Dean answers:

Is that a mirror in your knickers? -smiles, flashing teethe- Because I can see myself in them.

That’s a great dress. -winks- but it would look even better on my bedroom floor.

For more go here


Michael asks…

What are some corny/funny pick up lines?

One of my male characters in a story I’m writing is always suggestive and flirty towards my main female character. He’s always using these corny/hilarious pick up lines on her and that makes he start to like him more and more. I know it’s not totally clear, but I need some corny/funny pick up lines. I am running out. Please help me if you can!

P.S. I don’t care if they’re inappropriate or not. I need a variety. :)

Dean answers:

To Bimbobimbo’s eggs line, she could respond with “unfertilized”

Do you have a map? I just keep on getting lost in your eyes.
Baby, you must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet.
Do you know what would look good on you? Me.
I’m like ketchup, I go good on everything.
If I were a car, I’d be a Land Rover so I could cover all your terrain!
Nice outfit, baby. Can I talk you out of it?
Was your dad king for a day? He must have been to make a princess like you.
I’m not Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you like!
The sky must be jealous tonight, because all the stars are twinkling in your eyes.
Your legs must be tired because you’ve been running through my mind all night.
You’re so hot you would make the devil sweat.
Hey baby, you must be a light switch, because you turn me on!
Do you have a quarter? Because mom told me to call her when I found the girl of my dreams.
Hey baby, do you have a shovel? Because I sure am digging your body!
You remind me of a magnet, because you sure are attracting me over here!
My lips are registered weapons. Live dangerously, baby!
Is it hot in here or is it just you?
If I followed you home, would you keep me?
I just got library card, can I check you out?
Would you touch me so I can tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel?
Your lips look so lonely. Would they like to meet mine?
There must be something wrong with my eyes, I can’t take them off you.
I know milk does a body good, but baby, how much have you been drinking?
Baby, love is my fuel and you fill my tank.
Am I dead, Angel? Cause this must be heaven!
Your daddy must have been a baker, because you’ve got a nice set of buns.
I hope you know CPR because you take my breath away!
Are those space pants? Because your butt is out of this world!
Girl, you have more curves than a race track.
I’d run a mile to see your beautiful smile!
Are you lost miss? Because heaven is a long way from here.
Somebody needs to write EXPLOSIVE on you, because you’re the bomb!
Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?
Stop, drop, and roll, baby. You are on fire.
Your daddy must be a hunter, ’cause girl you are a fox!
Hello baby. I’m a thief and I’m here to steal your heart.
Hey, is it just me, or are we destined to be married?
Baby, you’re so sweet, you put Hershey’s outta business.
If being sexy was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged!
Do you eat a lot of Lucky Charms? Because you look magically delicious!
I must be lost. I thought paradise was further south.
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
Have you been arrested yet? It’s gotta be illegal to look that good.
Are you a witch, baby? Because you’ve got me under your love spell.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
You are so hot, baby. You must be real reason for global warming.
Hey baby, my name is Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
Is there an airplane nearby or is that just my heart taking off?
All those curves, and me with no brakes.
If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I would be walking through my garden forever.
Hello, I am a certified lifeguard. Do you need any mouth to mouth?
I have been thinking about you all night… Well, PARTS of you.
Wouldn’t we look cute on a wedding cake together?
Was you father an alien? Because there’s nothing else like you on earth!

James asks…

What are some funny pick up lines?

What are some of the funniest pick up lines that you’ve heard of or that have been used on you. I have one it’s “Your eyes are like an ocean and I want to get lost it them.” hahha, lmfao.

Dean answers:

My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can’t hold it in

Robert asks…

funny pick up lines/ ways to put your arm around someone or grab their hand?

I’m looking for cheesy jokes to tell my friends. like lame pick up lines and ways to put your arm around someone or grab their hand :D
like the shooting star one. where you say “hey look a shooting star” and point over their shoulder then leave your arm there.
or the pirate one. where you ask which shoulder theyd put their parrot on and leave your arm there.

Dean answers:

Good god this angel is floating away – then put your arm around their shoulder to hold them down on earth.
Ask her “what do you call an angel without wings” She will say “I don’t know” So you then ask “What is Your name?”
are these corny enough?

Donald asks…

What are some really funny (or cheesy) pick-up lines?

I’m looking for some really funny pickup lines so I can laugh! Come on people lets hear ’em…!! :-D

I wanna try some of these! LOL ;-)

Dean answers:

Ok here is some good ones PS: if you have an ipod touch/iphone you can get an app with all these lines that i am using now (ipick up lines)

did you fart cause you’re blowing me away

excuse me i think there is something in you’re eye oh wait its a sparkle

did it hurt when you fell from heaven

can i take a picture of you so i can show santa just what i want for christmas

do you have a band aid cause i scraped my knee falling for you

if i could rearrange the alphabet i would put you and i together

the list is endless have fun :)

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