Dean Answers Questions About Pick Up Lines Funny

Dean answers:

I lost my puppy, can you help me find him, i think he went in this cheap motel room.

My love for you is like diarrhea, i can’t hold it in. :)

if you and i were squirrels i would store my nuts in your hole. :]

you my not be the best looking woman, but beauty is only a light switch away.

If your going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.

Your face reminds me of a wrench, every time i think of it, my balls tighten up. :)

Dean answers:

The word of the day is “legs.” Let’s go back to my place and spread the word.
If your left leg is Thanksgiving, and your right leg is Christmas, can I visit you between the holidays?
Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.

Dean answers:

Are you a parking ticket?

… Because you have FINE written all over you.

Dean answers:

Crap. Something is wrong with my cell phone. {Oh Really. What is that?} Its just that…your numbers not in it.
What has 148 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My Zipper!
If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d have five cents.
There are 206 bones in the human body… Do you want another one?
Screw me if I am wrong, but haven’t we met before?
You may fall from the sky, you may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall… Is in love with me.
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don’t worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas. I’m not Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bedrock!
I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me?
A boy gives a girl 12 roses. 11 fake, 1 real and he says to her ” I will stop loving you when all the roses die”
See my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I’m cute.
Do you work at subway? Because you just gave me a footlong!
Was your Dad a baker? Because you’ve got a nice set of buns.
If your left leg is Thanksgiving, and your right leg is Christmas, can I visit you between the holidays?
You know what would look good on you? Me!
Say “I bet I can kiss you on the lips without touching you.” and kiss her, then tell her you lost the bet.
Are you a pirate? Cause I want cho booty.
If I followed you home, would you keep me?
I’ve noticed you noticing me and I’m just giving you notice that I’ve noticed you!
Are those space pants? Because your ass is out of this world!
Do u sleep on your belly at night? If no, can I?
If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
It’s a good thing that I have my library card. Why? Because I am totally checking you out!!
Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got FINE written all over you.
Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
I want to tell you your fortune. [Take her hand and write your phone number on it.] Your future is clear.
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
I may not be the best-looking guy in here, but I’m the only one talking to you.
Do you have a mirror in your pocket? ‘Cause I could see myself in your pants.
You turn my software into hardware!
My love for you is like diarrhea, I just cant hold it in!
Let’s have breakfast together tomorrow; shall I call you or nudge you?
People call me John, but you can call me Tonight!
Did you have lucky charms for breakfast? Because you look magically delicious!
Do I know you? Cause you look a lot like my next girlfriend.
Hi, will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into this cheap motel room across the street.
If you were a booger I would pick you first.
[man] Excuse me, would you like to dance? [women] NO! [man] Maybe u didn’t hear me…. I said u look really fat in those pants!
Can you take me to the bakery? Because, I want a Cutiepie like you!
If you were a burger at McDonald’s you’d be the McGorgeous.
I must be in heaven because I’m looking at an angel!
Excuse me, if I go straight this way, will I be able to reach your heart?
If I had a garden I’d put your two lips and my two lips together.
Would you sleep with a stranger? [No] Then Hi, my name is…
Can you kiss me on the cheek so I can at least say a cute girl kissed me tonight?
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
Hi, my name’s Fred, would you like to test my bed?
Roses Are Red, Candle Light Flickers, After The Meal, Its off With The Knickers.
If you were a new hamburger at McDonald’s, you would be a McGorgeous.
You might as well sleep with me because I’m going to tell everybody we did it anyway.
My name’s [your name]. That’s so you know what to scream in bed.
You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.
Your eyes are bluer than the Atlantic ocean, and baby I’m lost at sea!
Did the sun come up or did you just smile at me?
Do you know karate? Cause your body’s kickin!
I’m gay, think you can convert me?
You’re ugly, but you intrigue me…
Is your shirt felt? (No?) Do you want it to be?
If you were a laser you would be set on stunning.
Here’s $10. Drink until I am really good looking, then come and talk to me.
Somebody call the cops, because it’s got to be illegal to look that good!
I must be a snowflake, because I’ve fallen for you.
Bond….James Bond
If you were a car, I’d wax and ride you all over town.
Are you a hooker? Cause I’m hooked on you.
Did it hurt when you fell? [Girl: Huh?] When you fell from heaven?
Are you a clock? Cause you’re ticking me off.
Polar Bear (HUh) I just wanted to break the ice.
Could you please step away from the bar? You’re melting all the ice!
Are you form Tennessee? Cause you’re the only ten I see!!!
Go up to a girl, ask her: “Do you know what winks and screws like a tiger?” [No] Then wi

Dean answers:

You’re so sweet… You make Hershey run out of business.

Did you get a ticket? Cause you have FINE written all OVER you!

Dean answers:

Did you fart? Because you blew me away
You must be in a wrong place – the Miss Universe contest is over there.
Was that an earthquake or did u just rock my world?
I may not be a genie but I can make your dreams come true
Are you a magnet cuz im attracted to you
Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
I wish you were DSL so I could get high-speed access.
I know its not Christmas, but Santa’s lap is always ready.
Baby your like a student and I am like a math book, you solve all my
problems
“Why does it feel like the most beautiful girl in the world is in this
room?”
Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa just what I want for
Christmas.
Do you have any raisins? No? How about a date?
I was blinded by your beauty so I’m going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.
I’m sorry, were you talking to me? Her: No. Well then, please start.
I know I dont have a chance, but I just wanted to hear an angel talk.
Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you?
Hey I just realized this, but you look alot like my next girlfriend.
Are your legs tired, because you’ve been running through my mind all day long.
Are you lost? Because heaven’s a long way from here.
POOF! (What are u doing?) I’m here, where are your other two wishes?
I hope you know CPR, because you take my breath away.
Girl, you better have a license, cuz you are driving me crazy!
If you were the new burger at McDonalds you would be the Mcgorgeous!
Do you have the time? (she gives you the time) No, the time to write my number down .
Let’s make like a fabric softener and snuggle.
Are you an interior decorator? When I saw you the room became beautiful.
Hello, I’m a thief, and I’m here to steal your heart.
Is that top felt? [No] Would you like it to be?
Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?
Is your last name Gillete cause your the best a man can get.
Are you a parking ticket? (What?) You got fine written all over you.
I’m invisible. (Really?) Can you see me? (Yes) How about tomorrow night?
You can fall off a building, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me.
I have never had a dream come true until the day that I met you.
You look life my first wife! (how many have you had?) none.
Do you have a sunburn, or are you always this hot?
I’m addicted to yes, and I’m allergic to no. So what’s it gonna be?
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
Turn to the girl sitting next to you at the bar and say… “I’m not really this tall….I’m sitting on my wallet.”
This is a test of the emergency pickup line service. Beeeeeeeeeep. If you had been any less beautiful, you would have just heard a bad pickup line.
If this bar is a meat market, you must be the prime rib.
I know I’m not a grocery item but I can tell when you’re checking me out.
If beauty were sunlight, you’d shine from a million light-years away.
Do you mind if I hang out here until its safe back where I farted.
Life without you would be like a broken pencil…pointless.
Your body is a wonderland and i want to be Alice.
I’m like chocolate pudding, I look like crap but im as sweet as can be.
Can I have directions? ["To where?"] To your heart.
Are you an alien? Because you just abducted my heart.
Did you fart, ’cause you blow me away!
I hope there’s a fireman around, cause you’re smokin’!
If you were a booger I’d pick you first.
Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, it’s just a sparkle.
You’ve been a bad girl/boy. Go to my room.
If beauty were time, you’d be an eternity.
Do you know karate? ‘Cause your body is really kickin’.
Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?
Like the sheets on your bed I want cover you with love.
Do you have a Bandaid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
Hi, I just wanted to give you the satisfaction of turning me down; go ahead say no.
I hope your day is as radiant as your smile.
You make me melt like hot fudge on a sundae.
You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.
Are you an alien?, because you just abducted my heart.
What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.
I can tell your future, it is you giving me your number.
Hi, I’m Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.
Giant polar bear (What?) It’s an icebreaker. Hi, my name is….
Your so hot when i look at you I get a tan
I must be a snowflake, ‘cuz I’ve fallen for you.
You look so sweet your givin me a toothache.
My love for you is like the universe…neverending!!
If looks could kill you would be a weapon of mass destruction.
You – “Did it hurt”. The other person will naturally say “Did what hurt?”, You – “When you fell from heaven.”
Excuse me, can you empty your pockets? I believe you have stolen my heart.
Do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes!
You say “I bet you $20 I can kiss you without using my lips.” She says, “Bet’s on.” You kiss her then say, “I lost.”
You got something on your chest: my eyes
Do you believe in the hereafter? Well, then I guess you know what I’m here after.
I don’t know if you’re beautiful or not, I haven’t gotten past your eyes yet.
What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?
Your eyes are as blue as my toilet water at home.
I’m not drunk, I’m just intoxicated by you.
Do you want to make millions? Millions of babies!
The night is young, the moon is bright, and you are here with me tonight.
I wanna bag you like some groceries.
Kiss me if I am wrong, but isn’t your name (take a guess)…Janice????
Are you from Tennessee? Cause you’re the only TEN I see

Dean answers:

Hey babe. I lost my phone number. Can I have yours?

Dean answers:

“Are your parents from Iraq….

Cause I think you’re the bomb!”

This was used on me and I thought it was more annoying than funny.

Dean answers:

Would you like to have breakfast with me tomorrow morning? Yes!? Shall I call you or nudge you?

I guess this is only kind of funny if you aren’t living together.